LOOK! LOOK at this SEXY stocked fridge!
Particularly that stock of water. ‘Tis a thing
of Beauty, y’all. BEAUTY.

Food nerds, gather round. I have new and interesting things to tell you about Vietnamese supermarkets and foods.

First of all, it was not as terrifying as I thought. Sure, there were no signs in English, and nothing made any sense. But that’s not news, nothing anywhere here makes any sense, so go figure.

I entered through one of (I found out later) three entrances – it’s sorta open-air in the middle. It’s more like a Jewel-Osco than anything else, but smaller, and fresher. They carry packaged foods, fresh meats, cheeses, fruits, veggies, and breads, a small amount of alcohol, and clothes. Weirdly, a lot of clothes.

In the past I have found myself in, say, a Target, with an irregular layout. You know the Big Box stores I mean, where things are in slightly different places than the ones you’re used to? That always annoyed me, even though I know it shouldn’t. I shouldn’t EXPECT consistency like that in my stores, but I’ve been conditioned to believe that it’s the standard. Well, this is the solution. Go someplace so new that the old rules don’t apply.

Cheese with Bread: always a winner.

I decided that this was a good test for myself. I wandered up and down each aisle in the first row, looking for the things I really, REALLY needed – TP and Listerine. I found them in about ten minutes. After that, it was a cakewalk. I found the aisle with snacks and picked out stuff I could eat in my hotel room. Coconut juice peanuts (OH MY GOD) and shrimp-flavored wasabi-covered peas (already a favorite) rounded out this part of the list.

I found the veggies and fruits (hard to miss – that’s where everyone thronged) and found rambutan and pineapple. I got some jerky that was flavored with something like fish-astringent (0/10, would not buy again. VOMITLICIOUS). I got some laughing cow cheese and some french coffee bread bites to put it on. And I finished off my trip with water (lots of water), alcohol (mandarin flavored vodka), and Almond With Snow ice cream (just tastes like almonds to me, with some weird maybe-chocolate in it – still really good).

The Alcohol Watchmaiden thought she
stopped me from taking this. HA. Still, gross.

I even got a picture, illicitly, of the Carlo Rossi wine they had, which was more expensive than the Svedka vodka. Hilarious! Not in wine country, I suppose. I’m not touching THAT with a pole. It was weirdly expensive… shouldn’t Carlo Rossi be like 5 bucks? I guess it’s special because it’s an import.

I forgot the towel, but I suppose that’s an adventure for another day.

Plus, I got home and my friend Oanh brought me some lychee, which I’d never had before.

All in all… now I know where to get TP.